Friday, September 25, 2009

Manners Update

Manners are paramount to making a good image. Even though you think people aren't paying attention, they are. However manners change. A woman of the 50's wouldn't go out of the house without a hat or white gloves. OMG, can you imagine seeing that today? So here are the current trends...
1. If you receive a birth announcement, do you have to send a gift?
73% say no. If you know the person well, you may want to send something, but it is not necessary. New parents can't wait to share the joy of their new addition. Bottom line, you don't have to send a gift, but a very nice gesture and appreciated.
2. If a man and woman enter a revolving door at the same time, who goes first?
52% say the woman. Let's consider common courtesy here. Everyone should allow an elderly person to enter first. And while we're at it, giving up you seat in mass transit is 50/50. Of course, elderly should be given a seat, as well as pregnant women, but a man giving up his seat for a woman, don't expect it.
3. If you have guests over and the phone rings, do you answer it?
52% say no, stay focused on your guests. But what if it's a guest that can't find your home, answer the call, but keep it brief.
4. Do you always have to bring a hostess gift when invited to someone's house for dinner?
50% say yes. I imagine it depends on who is polling this question. Many firmly believe that if someone asks you for dinner, a hostess gift is expected. My advice to to be safe and bring something.
5. Is it okay to chat on your cell phone while riding public transportation?
Pretty divided, 44% say never, 49% say yes. When cell phones first were first introduced, the reception was not very good. "Cell yell" was typical. Now you can talk in a quiet voice and not disturb anyone. Obscene language is never acceptable.
6. What should you do with your sheets and towels if you overnight at someone's home?
68% say ask your hostess her preference. Most hosts will be thrilled if you have time to launder your sheets and towels, remake the bed and tidy up the bathroom, including emptying the trash can. However, some would prefer to take advantage of the few remaining minutes you have together to visit.
7. Do you need to stand up when you are introduced to someone you don't know?
62% say yes. That goes for men and women. Again, in the 50's women would stay seated, not any longer, both men and women should stand when introduced.
8. Do you need to reciprocate to every dinner invitation?
74% say you can reciprocate or treat the person who hosted you with something else. I think this would be an eye opener for some. You know the people, you have them over repeatedly and they never reciprocate. After awhile, the word "slacker" comes into mind. If someone does something nice for you (have you for dinner, take you to the airport, or some other favor) you must reciprocate in some fashion. If you don't cook, take them out for a meal.
9. If you receive a wedding invitation that doesn't include the person you've been dating for a long time, what do you do?
46% say bring it up to the bride as soon as possible. Most brides simply forgot and are more than happy to add another person if they are told immediately upon receiving the invitation. Be sensitive to the bride as cost may be a factor.
10. If you invite a person to an engagement party or shower, do you have to invite them to the wedding?
79% say yes. Absolutely!
11. Is it rude to ask someone how much their mortgage or rent is?
52% say yes. Come on, we all know better than this. Invading someone's financial privacy is always in poor taste.
12. Can you ask your child's school teacher to babysit?
80% say no, never. You are crossing the line.
13. Do you need to send a thank you note if you opened the gift in front of the person who gave it to you?
60% say yes. A written thank you shows appreciation.

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